Hans Yokublik stood on the rooftop, looking out across the Gotham City skyline. He nervously rolled up his sleeve, shivering, and checked the time on his watch. It was 10:17.
"You're late." a voice said from behind him.
Hans turned around, startled. A dark figure walked out of the shadow, his cape flapping in the wind. It was the Penguin, Gotham City's greatest criminal mastermind.
"I specifically asked you to be here at 10:15!" he said, leering his short, fat body over Hans. "And you're late!"
"B-b-but Mr. Penguin, sir!" Hans stuttered. "I was here a few minutes ago. Surely you are the one who is late!"
"I have been skulking behind that pile of crates for ten minutes now!" the Penguin flapped his cape, and wondered towards the building's edge. "And I saw you arrive at 10:16!"
"L-l-listen, Mr. Penguin," Hans pointed at the Penguin 'menacingly'. "Let's just get the d-d-deal done!"
"Not if I can help it!" a booming voice called out from the distance.
The Penguin turned. "Rats!" he said, looking at the sky. There was a circle of light in the sky with a dark blob upon it. "It's the cursed Bat Signal!"
"Nu uh!" said the deep voice. "That's just the light radiating... off... my... something or other. Something fat, that's for sure."
"P-p-perhaps it's a light globe stuck in your folds of fat!" Hans put in.
"No, surely it's a taxi!" the Penguin scoffed.
"Shut up!" said the deep voice. "I'm going to get you with my fat powers, stupid Penguin!"
"Ha!"the criminal mastermind laughed. "Come and get me!"
The Penguin and Hans Yokublik stood on the rooftop for several hours, listening to the deep voice's heavy panting.
"By god!" Hans said (finally). "Look! It's Mori Tosaki!"
A gigantic blob of fat, oil and sking began worming itself towards the building the Penguin was standing on. Several gigantic towers were caught in its folds.
"I'm... I... I am... I'm go.... I am go... I'm goin... wait... I'm going... I am going... to... to... wait..." Mori paused for a few minutes to pant. "I'm going to... Going to... Going... I am going... Oh, Jesus... Can I... Can I maybe... get a... Gatorade? Or... some... or some... Coke? Is... anyone... nevermind..." Mori paused to pant for little longer. "Any... way... I'm... I... I am going... I'm going... to... I am... Now... Now I can't... I can't remem... remem... remember.... what I... was... going to... going to... going...to say."
The Penguin stared at Mori, blinking.
"DIE BITCH!" the strain of shouting caused Mori to fall over onto the building, and the Penguin became caught in his giant folds of fat. Gotham City was safe again.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)